How to Talk To Your Parents

Talking with your parents about their estate planning can be a touchy subject. While it is touchy it is no less important. Making sure that your parents' assets are protected and distributed the way they wish is an imperative discussion for every family. Despite how uncomfortable bringing up the subject may be, it is crucial to do while your parents are in good mental and physical health. If families wait too long to have the discussion, they may never get the chance. Here are some tips on discussing estate planning with your parents…

Be patient and understanding

A one-time discussion with your parents may not get the job done. Be prepared to bring up the topic a few times before your parents feel comfortable and prepared to discuss. Keep in mind that even after they establish an estate plan it will remain a work in progress. As changes take place in their lives or in the laws, their estate will need to be updated.

Encourage your parents to seek advice from an expert

Sometimes talking with someone they are not related to can make all the difference, not to mention a legal expert knows more about the ins and outs of estate planning anyway. If your parents agree, join them in the meeting to learn more.

Emphasize the need for protection for the entire family

Having an estate plan helps protect family members from creditors or debt collectors or greedy people in general. Without the estate plan your parents' assets are viewed as free game for anyone who is persuasive and aggressive enough.
The National Association of Financial & Estate Planning's website sums up dying intestate like this, "[It] is like taking your property and attempting to throw it to your heirs on the other side of a deep chasm, a chasm which is filled with hazards. These hazards (probate, creditors, con-artists, lawsuits, judgments, lawyers, and death taxes) can damage much or most of the value of your estate."

Make your parents and their wishes the primary focus of the discussion

Talking about money and death is hard enough for anyone. Keep the discussion focused on how to protect their assets, how to minimize the amount that goes to the government, and how to ensure that the belongings they worked their whole life for are distributed the way they want.

Focus on life, not death

Your parents worked 40-50 years to acquire their assets and belongings and raise a family. Something they worked that hard for deserves to be protected and secured for the rest of their lives. An estate plan not only outlines who gets what but takes into account your medical preferences should you ever fall ill, who has the right to make decisions on your behalf, where all of your important documentation is stored should someone need to handle it for you, as well as protecting your family from any creditors or excessive taxing from the government.